|
|
|
|
コメント(28)
>>1
Fuck that.
A woman has her own brain, and she'd be doing a great disservice to her husband by nodding along every word that comes out of his mouth like some airhead. I'd expect my husband to want to be married to a human being, not an inflatable doll, and it's generally an admirable quality of human beigs to have opinions and beliefs they're willing to stand up for. I'd expect my husband to call me out when he thinks I'm wrong about something, too, because we have to be able to take personal criticism in order to live and grow.
The one case where I'd agree with you, though, is where kids are involved. I've worked a lot with kids, and I've seen the damage it does when parents contradict each other and don't uphold each other's parenting decisions. Kids are very quick to take advantage of this situation, play the parents against each other, and ultimately lose respect for authority.
Fuck that.
A woman has her own brain, and she'd be doing a great disservice to her husband by nodding along every word that comes out of his mouth like some airhead. I'd expect my husband to want to be married to a human being, not an inflatable doll, and it's generally an admirable quality of human beigs to have opinions and beliefs they're willing to stand up for. I'd expect my husband to call me out when he thinks I'm wrong about something, too, because we have to be able to take personal criticism in order to live and grow.
The one case where I'd agree with you, though, is where kids are involved. I've worked a lot with kids, and I've seen the damage it does when parents contradict each other and don't uphold each other's parenting decisions. Kids are very quick to take advantage of this situation, play the parents against each other, and ultimately lose respect for authority.
Anyway, I think a good wife is one who can balance her own happiness and wellbeing with that of her family.
Being self-centered and demanding is no good, and neglecting yourself for others so that you're constantly depressed is no good, either.
It's a pity that so many women seem to fall into one category or the other (and my mom somehow fits into both, which may explain why she's been divorced three times...)
Being self-centered and demanding is no good, and neglecting yourself for others so that you're constantly depressed is no good, either.
It's a pity that so many women seem to fall into one category or the other (and my mom somehow fits into both, which may explain why she's been divorced three times...)
>>8 I think that Murf's point was that the 'perfect' wife has an opinion on the topic and expresses that opinion but will always leave the decision to her husband. In other words she has respect for her husband.
Personally I agree that this is a desireable trait in a woman, it shows dedication to the relationship. Don't get me wrong, this isn't the way for everybody and it does clash quite catastrophically with modern western ideals of individuality and equality... But that is kindof what makes it so special when you find a woman who is truly happy to do it just for you.
I have no problem with women who do not want to follow this, as it is inherently sexist. Actually, if every woman did it then it would just be a cultural artifact and lose the very thing that makes it special... So in a way I am glad that it is controversial.
Well, I hope that that is a usefull insight into a modern chauvenist's mind!
The most important things for me are intelligence, cuteness and good motherly instincts (Put away the pen and pad Freud! It's for the children, not for me!). They probably rank in that order, followed by something similar to Murf's point.
Any candidates??? : )
Personally I agree that this is a desireable trait in a woman, it shows dedication to the relationship. Don't get me wrong, this isn't the way for everybody and it does clash quite catastrophically with modern western ideals of individuality and equality... But that is kindof what makes it so special when you find a woman who is truly happy to do it just for you.
I have no problem with women who do not want to follow this, as it is inherently sexist. Actually, if every woman did it then it would just be a cultural artifact and lose the very thing that makes it special... So in a way I am glad that it is controversial.
Well, I hope that that is a usefull insight into a modern chauvenist's mind!
The most important things for me are intelligence, cuteness and good motherly instincts (Put away the pen and pad Freud! It's for the children, not for me!). They probably rank in that order, followed by something similar to Murf's point.
Any candidates??? : )
リン, it sounds like you have had a bad experience.
I agree with you all, and I also agree with miss brianna. one thing though ...this is to the girls that read this...
GUYS ARE DUMB...(wait, before you guys jump on me)
what I mean is, if girls played it right, they could have there guy wrapped around there finger so easy.
for example, girls, just because you are right, you dont have to tell the guy that he is wrong, let him think that he is right.
and just because he hasnt thought of "it", make him think that he thought of "it".
and always make him feel like he is "THE MAN" . and NEVER SIDE AGAINST HIM. the world is to rough, you always need at least one person in your corner.
THATS JUST HOW MEN ARE MADE. and everything else he will bend over backwards to do for you, he will give you the world.
I agree with you all, and I also agree with miss brianna. one thing though ...this is to the girls that read this...
GUYS ARE DUMB...(wait, before you guys jump on me)
what I mean is, if girls played it right, they could have there guy wrapped around there finger so easy.
for example, girls, just because you are right, you dont have to tell the guy that he is wrong, let him think that he is right.
and just because he hasnt thought of "it", make him think that he thought of "it".
and always make him feel like he is "THE MAN" . and NEVER SIDE AGAINST HIM. the world is to rough, you always need at least one person in your corner.
THATS JUST HOW MEN ARE MADE. and everything else he will bend over backwards to do for you, he will give you the world.
SEXY BLACK: Thanks for post number 13 you covered some stuff that I wanted to add. Supporting the man, even just verbally, makes a woman seem like a good wife (to some men) and to be frank it makes you seem special. So definitely it is possible to get a guy to do your bidding, lol. Men will go to great extremes for a woman if she is wife material (which i think, ironically enough, probably reduces their chances... long explanation). Like, they will seriously worship you if they don't think that they can find another woman like you. Sounds like you have personal experience with this!
Be carefull not to abuse it though. If you give the guy a gentle push in the right direction it will take longer but he will eventually do most of what you want as he wants to make you happy.If you shove him in the direction that you want though he will not see you as a nice person after a few times and no matter how special you are he will think that you do not consider him a 'man' and therefore that you do not consider him husband material. In this way men are alot like horses!
Though if the guy is a loser (i.e. can't get another girl) he will stay around.
Sorry to be blunt, just trying to bridge the gap between a man a a womans mind.
>>19
Attractiveness does matter to every guy... If it didn't, what would stop the guy from being bisexual? But they are on a different level of priority for some. For me, average or even below average looks are fine if it is balanced by the girl being extraordinarily intelligent (like the sort of person you only meet a few times in your life kindof intelligent) and kind.
Question time!
Ladies, would you want a husband who honestly didn't care about a woman's looks?
For example if his last few girlfriends were morbidly obese, ugly and hairy but normal girls otherwise.
In Australia there are many guys who go out with ugly girls to meet the pretty friends of these girls. Moral depravity aside I do not think that this tactic would work.
Be carefull not to abuse it though. If you give the guy a gentle push in the right direction it will take longer but he will eventually do most of what you want as he wants to make you happy.If you shove him in the direction that you want though he will not see you as a nice person after a few times and no matter how special you are he will think that you do not consider him a 'man' and therefore that you do not consider him husband material. In this way men are alot like horses!
Though if the guy is a loser (i.e. can't get another girl) he will stay around.
Sorry to be blunt, just trying to bridge the gap between a man a a womans mind.
>>19
Attractiveness does matter to every guy... If it didn't, what would stop the guy from being bisexual? But they are on a different level of priority for some. For me, average or even below average looks are fine if it is balanced by the girl being extraordinarily intelligent (like the sort of person you only meet a few times in your life kindof intelligent) and kind.
Question time!
Ladies, would you want a husband who honestly didn't care about a woman's looks?
For example if his last few girlfriends were morbidly obese, ugly and hairy but normal girls otherwise.
In Australia there are many guys who go out with ugly girls to meet the pretty friends of these girls. Moral depravity aside I do not think that this tactic would work.
Here is why I think so: *please ignore the next four paragraphs if you don't love science speculation!*
Factors such as beauty reduce the ability of women to find monogamous, healthy male partners (or at least to have a wide selection). So the children of such women are disadvantaged as their fathers will not be likely to be good providers/breeders. So in the past (i.e. before 1000ish years ago), when a man being able actually mattered to survival/reproduction these women had less great, great etc. grandchildren a few generations down the line. So basically there are less of these women now due to natural selection from their poor mate availability.
I think that based on this if men found these women attractive then their children would also be disadvantaged, as the children would be less attractive on average and would be like the women above.
I think that this would still have a big enough evolutionary effect (just based on my gut instinct) to make these guys seem unattractive, as breeding with them also makes the woman disadvantaged as her children will be more likely to breed like the man. If they breed like the man (with less attractive people) then their children (the original woman's grandchildren) will be less attractive on average. Finally, as mentioned in the beginning, these less attractive grandchildren (again, on average) will produce less children. So from start to finish, if you breed with a man who doesn't care at all about his wife's attractiveness, you will have less great, great etc. grandchildren in a few generations.
Anyway, this is behavioural evolution, which is hard to predict without knowing all of the consequences. But my prediction would be that men who date ugly women would appear less attractive through this action... Though thinking about that now the guy could just abandon the ugly women even if she were pregnant, leaving him at a slight advantage... So it really depends how often this happens... Too much waffling!
*OK normal people can start reading again!*
So my question is; would you marry a guy who did not at all select women based on their looks?
Seing as the answers could be influenced by cultural ideals please talk about guys that you have actually gone out with instead of hypothetical examples... I don't really want a bunch of disney movie answers about the nice guy who's your friend and the perfect boyfriend (but whom you will never actually have sex with). Unless you think that you can truly give an honest response without experience!
Factors such as beauty reduce the ability of women to find monogamous, healthy male partners (or at least to have a wide selection). So the children of such women are disadvantaged as their fathers will not be likely to be good providers/breeders. So in the past (i.e. before 1000ish years ago), when a man being able actually mattered to survival/reproduction these women had less great, great etc. grandchildren a few generations down the line. So basically there are less of these women now due to natural selection from their poor mate availability.
I think that based on this if men found these women attractive then their children would also be disadvantaged, as the children would be less attractive on average and would be like the women above.
I think that this would still have a big enough evolutionary effect (just based on my gut instinct) to make these guys seem unattractive, as breeding with them also makes the woman disadvantaged as her children will be more likely to breed like the man. If they breed like the man (with less attractive people) then their children (the original woman's grandchildren) will be less attractive on average. Finally, as mentioned in the beginning, these less attractive grandchildren (again, on average) will produce less children. So from start to finish, if you breed with a man who doesn't care at all about his wife's attractiveness, you will have less great, great etc. grandchildren in a few generations.
Anyway, this is behavioural evolution, which is hard to predict without knowing all of the consequences. But my prediction would be that men who date ugly women would appear less attractive through this action... Though thinking about that now the guy could just abandon the ugly women even if she were pregnant, leaving him at a slight advantage... So it really depends how often this happens... Too much waffling!
*OK normal people can start reading again!*
So my question is; would you marry a guy who did not at all select women based on their looks?
Seing as the answers could be influenced by cultural ideals please talk about guys that you have actually gone out with instead of hypothetical examples... I don't really want a bunch of disney movie answers about the nice guy who's your friend and the perfect boyfriend (but whom you will never actually have sex with). Unless you think that you can truly give an honest response without experience!
The meaning was supposed to be opposite... or else those paragraphs would be filled with contradictions and I'd sound like a babbling idiot! (< well, moreso than intended)
As factors can go either way I thought that people would assume that I am talking about a negative correlation with beauty and that reduction. (<I love double negatives!).
I agree that it would have been better if I had said "variables" and "lack of beauty" to emphasise this though.
These aren't meant to be results though, just a prediction based on what I think is most likely. I haven't at all made up my mind.
As factors can go either way I thought that people would assume that I am talking about a negative correlation with beauty and that reduction. (<I love double negatives!).
I agree that it would have been better if I had said "variables" and "lack of beauty" to emphasise this though.
These aren't meant to be results though, just a prediction based on what I think is most likely. I haven't at all made up my mind.
- mixiユーザー
- ログインしてコメントしよう！
|
|
|
|
☆ENGLISH ONLY☆ 更新情報
-
最新のアンケート
