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☆国際Friends☆コミュのFind the mistakes! 第4回

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Alright, I know that you've all been waiting. Here's another story with some mistakes. Please find them. Good luck to you!!!!! p(^-^)q
P.S- Maybe GovZさん will help me check your answers. m(_ _)m


Yesterday was August 31st. It was my sisters, Mixiko's, birthday. She changed 27 years old. My family and I host a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-worker. We ordered 3 middle sized pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents during she ate and then she opened another presents afterwards. She got some perfume, jewelries, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch. She seemed to likes her all gifts. All of guests went home around 11pm. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~

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Yesterday was on August 31st. It was my sister, Mixko's birthday. She turned 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while eating and then she opened another presents after that. She got some perfumes. jewelries, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch. They seemed like her all gifts. All of guests went home at around 11pm. It wasn a very successful party. (^0^)/~
菜未さん、you are 50% right. Please try again!! p(^-^)q

美歌さん、40% right. Please try again!! p(^-^)q
Yesterday was on August 31st. It was my sister, Mixko's birthday. She turned 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while eating. And then, she opened another presents after that. She got some perfumes. jewelry, clothes and somebody even gave a watch to her. All of gifts seemed be her taste. Everybody left at around 11pm. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~

ものすごく変えてしまいました。
Coz, i had no idea...
Yesterday was the 31st of August. It was my sister Mixiko`s birthday. She turned 27. My family and I threw a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium pizza, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some of the presents while she was eating. Then she opened the rest of her presents afterwards. She got some perfumes, jewelries, and clothes. Someone even gave her a watch. She seemed to have liked all of her gifts. Everyone went home at around 11 p.m. It was a very successful party.
Yesterday was August 31st. It was my sister, Mixiko's birthday. She became 27 years old. My family and I organized a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-worker. We ordered 3 of medium sized pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while she was eating and then she opened another presents afterwards. She got some perfume, jewelries, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch. She seemed to like all of gifts. All of guests went home around 11pm. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~
Yesterday was August 31st. It was my sister Mixiko's birthday. She turned to 27 years old. My family and I hosted a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 middle sized pizzas, fried chickens and french fries. She opened some presents during eating, and then she opened another present afterwards. She got some perfumes, jewelries, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch. She seemed to like her all gifts. All of guest went home around 11pm. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~
美歌さん、good effort. Still 40% though. Please try again! p(^-^)q

菜未さん, you are 65% right. Getting better! Please give it another go! p(^-^)q

Agradableさん、good try! You're 75% right. Please try again. p(^-^)q

みなじんさん、nice to see you again. You are 65% right. Please try again! p(^-^)q

Pockyさん、good try! You're 60% right. Please give it another try! p(^-^)q
Yesterday was on August 31st. It was my sister, Mixko's birthday. She turned 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium pizzas, fried chickens and french fries. She opened some presents while she was eating. And then, she opened other presents. She got some perfumes. jewelry, clothes and somebody even gave her a watch. All of gifts seemed be her taste. Everybody went home at around 11. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~
Hello guys,

I really wanted to help but my boss scolded me. He caught me doing mixi stuff in the office ... hahahahahaha ... damn i am unlucky.

Twinkle-san, I will try my best to help.

Everyone seems to be getting better. I am not really an english teacher but I will do whatever I can to help you guys.

Have fun, and dont be afraid to make mistakes, because that is the only way we can be better really fast.

Thanks and take care everyone,

GovZ
菜未さん、good try again! You're 70% right now. p(^-^)q
GovZさん、hope you don't get caught by your boss again.You gotta be more sneaky.(^^ゞHave a nice day!
Yesterday was August 31st. It was my sister, Mixiko's birthday. She became 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-worker. We ordered 3 medium size of pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while she was eating and then she opened another presents afterwards. She got some perfumes, jewelries, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch. She seemed to like all of gifts. All of guests went home at around 11pm. It was a very successful party. (^_-)
Yesterday was on August 31st. It was my sister, Mixko's birthday. She turned 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while she was eating. And then, she opened other presents. She got some perfumes. jeweles, clothes and somebody even gave her a watch. She seemed to like her all gifts. Everyone went home at around 11. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~
みなじんさん、goood try again. You are still about 65%. Good luck next time! p(^-^)q

菜未さん、much better! You're about 80% right now! 頑張れ!p(^-^)q

美歌さん、good try too! You're about 60% right now! Nice improvement! p(^-^)q
Yesterday was on August 31st. It was my sister, Mixko's birthday. She turned 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while she was eating. And then, she opened other presents. She got some perfumes. jeweles, clothes and somebody even gave her a watch. She seemed to like her all gifts. Everyone went home at around 11 p.m. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~
菜未さん、85% right!! Almost there... p(^-^)q

美歌さん、70% right now!! Ganbattene!! p(^-^)q
5%だけ上がった。。。5%って微妙だ。。。(笑)頑張ります!
Yesterday was August 31st. It was my sister, Mixiko's birthday. She turned 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium size of pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while she was eating, and then she opened another presents afterwards. She got some perfumes, jeweles, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch. She seemed to like all of gifts. All of guests went home at around 11pm. It was a very successful party. (^_-)
Yesterday was August 31st. It was my sister, Mixko's birthday. She turned 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while she was eating. And then, she opened other presents. She got some perfume, jeweles, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch. She seemed to like all of her gifts. Everyone went home at around 11 p.m. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~
みなじんさん、still about 65%. Try again!! Good luck! p(^-^)q

美歌さん、you are about 75% right now. また頑張ってください。p(^-^)q

菜未さん、you are very close!! 98% right!! 後もう少しだ〜p(^-^)q
Yesterday was August 31st. It was my sister, Mixko's birthday. She turned 27 years old. My family and I had a party for her at home. We invited her friends and some of her co-workers. We ordered 3 medium pizzas, fried chicken and french fries. She opened some presents while she was eating. And then, she opened the other presents. She got some perfume, jewellery, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch. She seemed to like all of her gifts. Everyone went home at around 11 p.m. It was a very successful party. (^0^)/~
( ^∇^)/*。・゚・*。・゚・*。・*。・゚*。・゚*。・゚・*。・゚・*。・゚・*。*。\(^∇^ )
( ^∇^)/*。・゚・*。・゚・*。Congratulations*。・*。・゚*。・゚*\(^∇^ )
( ^∇^)/*。・゚・*。・゚・*。・゚・菜未さん!!!*。・*。・゚*。・゚*。・゚・\(^∇^ )
( ^∇^)/*。・゚・*。・゚・*。・*。・゚*。・゚*。・゚・*。・゚・*。・゚・*。*。\(^∇^ )
( ^∇^)/*。・゚・*。・゚・*。・*。・゚*。・゚*。・゚・*。・゚・*。・゚・*。*。\(^∇^ )



You are the winner of Find the Mistakes 第4回!!

Keep up the good work!!!

(^-^)∠※パンッ!(^-^)∠※パンッ!(^-^)∠※パンッ!(^-^)∠※パンッ!
thanx heaps!
but i have a few questions.

i had noooo idea. so i changed a lot.
-これは本当はどうしたかったの?↓

"and then she opened another presents afterwards."

and thenとafterwardsが同じ文章に入るのは変かな?って思って。。。それとpresentsだから何個か他にpresentをもらったと思ってthe other にしました。another だと、一つだけだと思ったから。
i wonder why it should say "THE" other.

-And i've heard that usually give "jewelry" as gifts not "jewels". As for jewels as gifts. Sounds strange.
A jewel is an expensive stone whereas jewelry is something I can wear.
What do you think?
"and then she opened another presents afterwards"= then is like そして. afterwards is like その後. So, そして、その後に他のプレゼントをあけました。
"she opened the other presents"= means, "She opened the other presents that she got." OR "She opened some other presents." Another way to change the sentence is, "and then she opened some other presents."

In my story at the top, I wrote, "She got some perfume, jewelries, clothes and somebody even gave her a new watch." Jewelry is noncount. Just like money. I got some money. Not moneys.

Okay ですか?
thanks(*^_^*) I made sense.

I already noticed was "jewelry is noncount".
And then I thought that in this case,Jeweles are better.
But It was wrong I thought.
So...I meant, A jewel is an expensive stone whereas jewelry is something you can wear. I've never heard of anyone giving a jewel as a present. Sounds strange.
Well.. Do you think so?
Yes, you're right. It is unusual to give someone jewels.
I'd like both jewellry or jewels though. Especially diamonds. (*゚ー゚*)
Hello guys, missed this very dynamic discussion.

菜未-san -> i would not mind having jewels for a present ;) just kidding. But you are quickly improving. I guess it is because of two things :

1) your willingness to learn and for not giving up just because of mistakes.
2) a great sensei ... online sensei hehehehehehe

please keep it up and take care.


Twinkle-san -> I dont think you need me here ehehehehehe you are a great sensei. Good luck on your endeavors.

Take care,

GovZ
Hey GovZ,
Thanks, I'm not a great sensei... just an okay one. heh heh!! You're explanations about grammar are always really easy to understand. Maybe if you want, you could start the next "Find the Mistakes 第5回".(^-^)b
GovZ san

Thanks! I hope I improve english.
I don't think that I'm a online sensei.
I just enjoy.lol.

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