Is it just me, or is it hard to gain acceptance from Japanese people without always being the initiator and "proving" your "Japaneseness". I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to be negative but I just can't help but express my frustration and disappointment at how often it seems (to me) that all of the effort is too often one-sided. I find it very sad that as much as I love my Japanese half, and embrace my culture, heritage, my blood, I feel ignored, left out, and wholly unappreciated by my "full" Japanese people despite all that we share. Is it just where I've lived? Is it just a matter of age?
Has anyone else out there felt shunned?
Has anyone else out there felt shunned?
|
|
|
|
コメント(11)
I feel the same way but in the opposite direction - No British person will ever treat me as a British over here in the UK. To an extent its understandable thinking that I look more Japanese (at least to most of the British people) and that I don't embrace the British culture (accent, ways of thinking, interests) as I've lived in Japan and got educated in an American international school for almost all my life.
Since I can't really 'prove' my Britishness (other than my blood), I don't expect British people to treat me as a British.
I know that its probably a different case for you.
Do you look more 'gaijin' than Japanese?
Where do you live in Japan?
I would say these two factors have a major impact on how you would be looked at or treated.
Since I can't really 'prove' my Britishness (other than my blood), I don't expect British people to treat me as a British.
I know that its probably a different case for you.
Do you look more 'gaijin' than Japanese?
Where do you live in Japan?
I would say these two factors have a major impact on how you would be looked at or treated.
Thanks for the reply Big Mac. I wasn't sure if anybody would comment/reply. I thought my posting might just be ignored as negative speech.
I can relate to your reverse experience as well. I had some tough times when I was much younger being accepted by fellow Americans when I lived in America.
I feel that my experience as a child and my ongoing experiences as an adult point to what I think is a sometimes difficult and unfair tightrope that a lot of us that are of mixed ethnicity are made to endure.
I myself think I look more gaijin than Japanese but I do also realize that I look more Asian (Japanese) than American as well, or at least different enough to be distinguished as being "different". I have found that which, Japanese or American, I look more like is dependent on who is doing the looking. I have had plenty of people tell me I like one way or the other.
I last lived in Tokyo but am actually living in the U.S. right now. There is a Japanese/Asian community here though and well, I haven't felt much love. I guess I can understand if they just aren't sure if I am Japanese/Asian and are shy about approaching me but there are several that know that I am Japanese and rather than at least say hi or something when we pass eachother they pretend not to notice. Now, to be fair, not everyone has been like that. There are some fellow Japanese people that have been quite friendly and always greet me with a smile, but one thing I find sad is that the friendliest people I know in the Asian community here are not Japanese but Vietnamese and Chinese.
I can relate to your reverse experience as well. I had some tough times when I was much younger being accepted by fellow Americans when I lived in America.
I feel that my experience as a child and my ongoing experiences as an adult point to what I think is a sometimes difficult and unfair tightrope that a lot of us that are of mixed ethnicity are made to endure.
I myself think I look more gaijin than Japanese but I do also realize that I look more Asian (Japanese) than American as well, or at least different enough to be distinguished as being "different". I have found that which, Japanese or American, I look more like is dependent on who is doing the looking. I have had plenty of people tell me I like one way or the other.
I last lived in Tokyo but am actually living in the U.S. right now. There is a Japanese/Asian community here though and well, I haven't felt much love. I guess I can understand if they just aren't sure if I am Japanese/Asian and are shy about approaching me but there are several that know that I am Japanese and rather than at least say hi or something when we pass eachother they pretend not to notice. Now, to be fair, not everyone has been like that. There are some fellow Japanese people that have been quite friendly and always greet me with a smile, but one thing I find sad is that the friendliest people I know in the Asian community here are not Japanese but Vietnamese and Chinese.
Big Mac>pretty surprized to find u here...lol
neway 龍樹さん, I'll have to say if ur not outgoing, its difficult to create an opportunity for others to understand people like yourself. If people avoid to know u, its up to you but I would suggest to move on...they're too many people in this world to mind about. Keep on lookin for those that understand you. And one day you'll find yourself a Japanese friend.
I grew up in Japan for 18 years nd i havta say twas an interestin experience since ppl treat me like a foreigner until I spoke to them. I spent most of my years in an international school but did make good japanese friends there and at part-time jobs where I was the only one with foreign blood(that I'm aware of). It took a while for them to be comfortable around me but I just kept on talkin.
Now I'm in the states for college nd I still go through the same ol thing of being the different one (since I go to an all-black university) I even had times when a dorm staff denied me of being part black...and i sure do get them suspicious looks walkin in the city of DC (lotta black people)
Where ever you are, you'll face difficulties of people trying to classify you or judge you based on looks. Its your job to reach out if you want them to understand you. If it still doesn't work, just move on. They're just not worth the time. U gotta enjoy ur life!
I dunno if its worth to refer to but this is what i think about situations like that.
neway 龍樹さん, I'll have to say if ur not outgoing, its difficult to create an opportunity for others to understand people like yourself. If people avoid to know u, its up to you but I would suggest to move on...they're too many people in this world to mind about. Keep on lookin for those that understand you. And one day you'll find yourself a Japanese friend.
I grew up in Japan for 18 years nd i havta say twas an interestin experience since ppl treat me like a foreigner until I spoke to them. I spent most of my years in an international school but did make good japanese friends there and at part-time jobs where I was the only one with foreign blood(that I'm aware of). It took a while for them to be comfortable around me but I just kept on talkin.
Now I'm in the states for college nd I still go through the same ol thing of being the different one (since I go to an all-black university) I even had times when a dorm staff denied me of being part black...and i sure do get them suspicious looks walkin in the city of DC (lotta black people)
Where ever you are, you'll face difficulties of people trying to classify you or judge you based on looks. Its your job to reach out if you want them to understand you. If it still doesn't work, just move on. They're just not worth the time. U gotta enjoy ur life!
I dunno if its worth to refer to but this is what i think about situations like that.
AMEN!!! lol
i mean, i was able to find some friends who were pure Japanese and would accept me for the weirdo i am...
But yeah, i hear ya' on people not accepting others. Period.
i went to middle and high school in Japan, but i never got along with anyone there.
Hell, i was bullied just cuz i'm only "half"-Japanese. ^^;;
i'm a mix of Japanese and Philipino, btw.
So in essence, i'm 100% Asian. XDDD
i look totally like an avarage Japanese girl!
okay, i'm starting to ramble, but just wanted to add my 2 cents.
Peace. ^^
i mean, i was able to find some friends who were pure Japanese and would accept me for the weirdo i am...
But yeah, i hear ya' on people not accepting others. Period.
i went to middle and high school in Japan, but i never got along with anyone there.
Hell, i was bullied just cuz i'm only "half"-Japanese. ^^;;
i'm a mix of Japanese and Philipino, btw.
So in essence, i'm 100% Asian. XDDD
i look totally like an avarage Japanese girl!
okay, i'm starting to ramble, but just wanted to add my 2 cents.
Peace. ^^
In my last post I meant to say(type) that "I have had plenty of people tell me I look one way or the other. " not "I have had plenty of people tell me I like one way or the other."
Okay, now that my correction is out of the way...
I understand that some people are not worth the effort but it is hard to just forget about it too. Now, I don't want everybody to think I obsess about this but it is hard to completely ignore the feeling of who you are (half of at least) being discounted.
I've been the gaijin through most of my life, irregardless of where I lived, Japan or the U.S., and I moved a few times along the way so I learned early on to be outgoing but it did always bother me.
I've talked about Japan and Japanese people but I also feel that there is a lack of recognition in the U.S., with regard to the minority status of those that are of mixed ethnicity. I mean, Asians, not just Japanese, Korean, Chinese, Vietnamese, etc., all Asians combined only make up about 1.7% of the population of the U.S. if I recall and those that are mixed make up even less. Yet I watch "Mad TV" and there's a white lady pretending to be Asian portraying an Asian stereotype in America.
But, back to the earlier topic, I think my experiences with the people in the community here have some to do with age as well to be fair. I'm closing in on 30 and a good number of the Japanese people around here are in their late teens to early 20s. May not seem like much of an age gap but man do things change in those few years.
Well, gotta go but I look forward to seeing how the discussion has progressed the next time I log on.
Thanks to all those that have added to the discussion.
Okay, now that my correction is out of the way...
I understand that some people are not worth the effort but it is hard to just forget about it too. Now, I don't want everybody to think I obsess about this but it is hard to completely ignore the feeling of who you are (half of at least) being discounted.
I've been the gaijin through most of my life, irregardless of where I lived, Japan or the U.S., and I moved a few times along the way so I learned early on to be outgoing but it did always bother me.
I've talked about Japan and Japanese people but I also feel that there is a lack of recognition in the U.S., with regard to the minority status of those that are of mixed ethnicity. I mean, Asians, not just Japanese, Korean, Chinese, Vietnamese, etc., all Asians combined only make up about 1.7% of the population of the U.S. if I recall and those that are mixed make up even less. Yet I watch "Mad TV" and there's a white lady pretending to be Asian portraying an Asian stereotype in America.
But, back to the earlier topic, I think my experiences with the people in the community here have some to do with age as well to be fair. I'm closing in on 30 and a good number of the Japanese people around here are in their late teens to early 20s. May not seem like much of an age gap but man do things change in those few years.
Well, gotta go but I look forward to seeing how the discussion has progressed the next time I log on.
Thanks to all those that have added to the discussion.
Yes,I can relate to what u are saying.
I think that Japanese people will always look at me as pure Gaijin b/c of my appearance even though I feel closer to my Japanese side. Its strange b/c Japanese people usually don't see that I am Half Japanese at all whereas white people can usually tell that I am mixed w/ Asian.
I think that Japanese people will always look at me as pure Gaijin b/c of my appearance even though I feel closer to my Japanese side. Its strange b/c Japanese people usually don't see that I am Half Japanese at all whereas white people can usually tell that I am mixed w/ Asian.
u know this lady told me once before i moved to the states.
"inter-racial people will always have a hard time adapting in either culture, because neither one will accept you as 'whole.' but dont let them get to you because you are perfect as a person, and you're blessed to have 2 different cultures"
n i realized, dis is da truth, whether i like it or not. wherever i live dis will prolly be da same, unfortunately. people will always classify us as 'not being whole, and no matter wut u do ur not gonna be good enough b/c, in their eyes, ur not sure which culture u wanna be more." but as she said, we're no more less than anybody else. we doubled in culture, doubled in intelligence, doubled da blessings.
if i wanna eat fried chicken, sushi, spaghetti, miso soup n banana pudding all at once, they cant tell me i need to pick one b/c mixing different cultures r unacceptable. of course, i wudnt mix all these up in one sitting but im jus sayin... lol
all we can do is to educate others, instead of classifying them as "bein ignorant" and let them know how great we are, we deserve da luv. n if they dont get it, oh well dats they're loss. lol
well, i feel like i have so much i want to share, but i guess i'll end dis one here... lol
"inter-racial people will always have a hard time adapting in either culture, because neither one will accept you as 'whole.' but dont let them get to you because you are perfect as a person, and you're blessed to have 2 different cultures"
n i realized, dis is da truth, whether i like it or not. wherever i live dis will prolly be da same, unfortunately. people will always classify us as 'not being whole, and no matter wut u do ur not gonna be good enough b/c, in their eyes, ur not sure which culture u wanna be more." but as she said, we're no more less than anybody else. we doubled in culture, doubled in intelligence, doubled da blessings.
if i wanna eat fried chicken, sushi, spaghetti, miso soup n banana pudding all at once, they cant tell me i need to pick one b/c mixing different cultures r unacceptable. of course, i wudnt mix all these up in one sitting but im jus sayin... lol
all we can do is to educate others, instead of classifying them as "bein ignorant" and let them know how great we are, we deserve da luv. n if they dont get it, oh well dats they're loss. lol
well, i feel like i have so much i want to share, but i guess i'll end dis one here... lol
Sorry to butt in...
I'm also half American, half Japanese but look very much Asian. I just feel that no matter what our races are, we should be proud of ourselves. I have never felt left out...as a matter of fact, I grew up in Japan with both American and Japanese friends. That's double the happiness! Then when I stayed in the states, I had the same result.
I had lots of friends who envied me because I was half. People envied me for being able to speak more than one language, being able to understand more than one culture, and too much more to write. Let's ignore the people who treat us negatively and have more pride in ourselves!!!
I'm also half American, half Japanese but look very much Asian. I just feel that no matter what our races are, we should be proud of ourselves. I have never felt left out...as a matter of fact, I grew up in Japan with both American and Japanese friends. That's double the happiness! Then when I stayed in the states, I had the same result.
I had lots of friends who envied me because I was half. People envied me for being able to speak more than one language, being able to understand more than one culture, and too much more to write. Let's ignore the people who treat us negatively and have more pride in ourselves!!!
I'm half British and Japanese and I embrace both cultures. I generally feel blessed to have two different backgrounds and being brought up in an international environment or utopia.
Anyway getting onto my peeves, what I couldn't stand was when I was forced to choose my nationality here because it is against the law to have two nationalities or more specifically 2 passports after a certain age. I believe the same is the case in the States. In Britain you are allowed to have two passports. For a while I ignored the constant barrage of letters reminding me to pick my nationality, but after a while I was fed up, went to the ward and signed a piece of paper stating that I am officially recognised as a Japanese citizen. I still hang onto my British passport though, which wasn't forcibly taken away from me. I will never get rid of it because of it's value and benefits. With it I can travel freely through EU nations, pretty much breeze through the immigration queues at airports, own property in any EU listed country and the list goes on. There is still the inconvenience of having two separate names when getting registered in a new company, signing documents and so on but it is a small price to pay.
A friend of mine however who is half American/Japanese is thinking to get rid of his American citizenship because he doesn't want to have the burden of paying two separate taxes! There really should be a compromise or some form of compensation if you are paying for both. Is there?? I don't know...
Anyway getting onto my peeves, what I couldn't stand was when I was forced to choose my nationality here because it is against the law to have two nationalities or more specifically 2 passports after a certain age. I believe the same is the case in the States. In Britain you are allowed to have two passports. For a while I ignored the constant barrage of letters reminding me to pick my nationality, but after a while I was fed up, went to the ward and signed a piece of paper stating that I am officially recognised as a Japanese citizen. I still hang onto my British passport though, which wasn't forcibly taken away from me. I will never get rid of it because of it's value and benefits. With it I can travel freely through EU nations, pretty much breeze through the immigration queues at airports, own property in any EU listed country and the list goes on. There is still the inconvenience of having two separate names when getting registered in a new company, signing documents and so on but it is a small price to pay.
A friend of mine however who is half American/Japanese is thinking to get rid of his American citizenship because he doesn't want to have the burden of paying two separate taxes! There really should be a compromise or some form of compensation if you are paying for both. Is there?? I don't know...
- mixiユーザー
- ログインしてコメントしよう！
|
|
|
|
